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by

F. C. Gilbert

(A Hebrew Christian)

An autobiography

Some paragraphs have been split for emphasis

 ^(p64)

CHAPTER    VI

ON THE SHORES OF AMERICA

1. If my father had been alive, it is doubtful whether I should have come to the “ land of the free,” as he was very much prejudiced against this country. Some twenty years prior to this time, he left England for the United States, to improve his financial condition. He was in this land two and a half years. He had been here but a short time when he wrote to my mother,

“America is a great and wonderful country. It is a large country and a very prosperous one. A person can make money, and everybody has an opportunity; but a man will lose his religion here in a very short time.”

He told my mother that he would not have her or any of
the children in America under any consideration, as it was
a godless land, and the Jews were losing their religion very
rapidly. He told her if the children were brought up in
America all their thoughts of Judaism would be lost. The
Sabbath and the holidays were discarded, God was little
thought of, and the Bible was losing its power among the
Jews. 

2. While father was very desirous of improving the financial condition of our family, and felt that a little more of this world’s goods would be a great assistance to us, he would not do it at the risk of losing his religion. ^(p65)   So he decided to shake off the dust of American soil from his feet, and return to England, to train his children for Judaism rather than for the wealth of American gold.

3. Repeatedly I was told of the experiences that my father had while in this country, and of course it was with much fear and trembling that my mother let me go. She gave me many good admonitions to continue in Judaism, and to follow the faith of my fathers. She provided me with a nice bag to carry my garments and phylacteries, and a small garment to wear, that in case sickness or death should overtake me, I might be recognized as a Jew and be buried in consecrated soil. (a)

4. With these impressions of many years’ standing, I was quite thoughtful on my way across the ocean. I made up my mind that I would do what I could to follow my religion, and be true to my mother and to convictions. Just before landing, however, I met with a serious accident on board ship, the results of which have been with me these many years, and doubtless will stay with me till the mortal body shall be changed to immortality. But evidently this was one of the “all things,” to curb my ambition, and to prepare me for my future work. The first ten days I spent in New York were in a hospital, some twenty miles from the city, on an island among entire strangers, and not among the kindest of people, either.

5. We sometimes read of awful things happening in city and state institutions, and the reader can scarcely believe that such things are possible. But one who has been obliged to attend one such place knows that the whole truth is hardly ever told. ^(p66) To hear the poor sick people groan in this hospital was terrible, and the abuse they received at the hand of the attendants was inhuman. After a time I felt improved from my injury, and was cordially received by my cousin in New York City.

6. My relatives were very kind to me for a few weeks, and did all that was possible to make me comfortable. I soon found that New York City was not a place to get health. My cousin was very pious, and he did all he could to encourage me in the way of religion. It was not very long before my religious sensibilities were shocked, and I was soon convinced that my father was right. I can scarcely express how I felt the first Sabbath day after I was located in New York City, this great Jewish metropolis of the world. It seemed to me that the people had very little regard for God, for Moses, or for anything that was in harmony with the teachings of Judaism.

7. My cousin told me of the dangers and pitfalls I was likely to meet; but his children did not follow in his steps. Being with them nearly all the time for a season, my grip on Judaism was fast letting go, and it was not long before I concluded that somehow I could not remain in America and continue religious. My health was not improving very rapidly, and the younger portion of my relatives were no assistance to me in health, morals, or religion.

8. The time came when it was necessary that I should seek employment. I knew that I must do something to earn a livelihood and take care of myself. Among the first things that my cousin told me was to be sure to secure work where I could keep the Sabbath, and follow out the teachings that I had received at home. ^(p67) I felt that I must do this, as it seemed to me that my conscience was too strongly impressed to entirely abandon the teachings of my parents, of the rabbis, and of all Judaism. I succeeded at first, and felt quite hopeful that I could still be a fairly good Jew, even though I was in America.

9. But finally I had to secure employment among Gentiles. After a hard and laborious effort I succeeded in obtaining a position which seemed as though it might be a stepping-stone to affluence. I had a hard battle with my conscience. Must I disregard the Sabbath of the Lord, the holidays, the feast days, and really abandon my religion entirely? Oh the struggle was awful, but I at last decided to accept the position, hoping that some way I should get through it with ease and grace.

10. The first Sabbath morning came that I was obliged to work. While there had been times when I did not observe it so sacredly and strictly as I should, still I felt that I was not entirely disregarding God’s commandments; for there were stated times when I could repent and make proper amends with Heaven. Now I was to actually work on the Sabbath, and on those sacred days of which the Lord said that the person who should do this would be cut off from among his people.[1]

11. It seemed that I could not arise from bed. I felt as though I should become paralyzed. Everything seemed against me, even in getting ready to go to the place of business. I felt all along the way to the factory that I was haunted. ^(p68) My conscience seemed to tell me that God was displeased with me, and impressed me that something awful would happen before the day was out. It was a terrific battle, and I thought I never could endure it. I finally reached my destination, but it was with fear and trembling. Every motion I made I felt condemned. I took the knife to cut the cloth, and in my nervousness the knife slipped and made a terrible gash in my finger. I seemed to realize that I was already reaping. The battle with conscience was on, and it occurred to me now I had gone so far, I could not recant. The devil told me I had to earn my living, and that as long as I was in America I had to do as all others did. I continued to work. I had not been working very long before I cut myself again, and this time worse than at first. I became ill, and felt as though I could not work any longer that day. I asked to be excused, so left the shop, and endeavored to drown my conscience and some way fight it out. What an awful thing it is to fight against one’s conscience! How important it is to have that conscience educated in harmony with the word of God!

12. I finally yielded to the tempter. The next week it was not so hard to work, and I concluded that I would take my chances, as the rest of the Jews were taking theirs. Thus I kept this position for nearly a year, when I was informed that I was to be promoted, and it seemed now that I was in a fair way to make money. The first day I worked in the shop I earned forty-two cents; within nine months from that time I was making fifteen or sixteen dollars a week, and now there was a prospect that I could easily earn twenty-five or thirty dollars a week.

^(p69)  13. How true it is that Satan does sometimes permit a man to prosper, that in the end he may more completely compass his destruction. My health was not much improved. Having let go my grip on religion, the only thing I had to help as far as I was taught, I was not on the road to moral improvement. But it seemed as though I might make plenty of money soon, and then perhaps I could get health, by paying for it. For a time everything went well, and the financial prospects were very encouraging. Occasionally I went to the synagogue, thinking that perhaps the Lord would not look so hard upon me, though I felt all the time that my father certainly told the truth about the Jewish religion in America. But it was evident that God had some other plans in store for me, for my stay in this position was not very long.

14. It was a law in the factories of New York that every one had to be a member of a labor organization, and I had to join with the rest; for I was told that was the way to get wealth in this country. I was further instructed that if I once did my work, I was never to do it again, even though it was not done so well as it ought to be, as the unions will protect a man if he will only keep his dues paid.

15. The foreman in our department having left his position, a young and inexperienced man was selected to take his place. One day he came and told me that I had not done some work as he thought it ought to be done. I told him that it had been done according to requirement, and that was all that was necessary. He insisted on my doing it all over again, and I was as persistent that I had done all I should, in harmony with the laws of the union. He informed the proprietor, and I was politely told that I would have to lose my position. ^(p70) The whole thing amounted to only five cents, and it could have been done in about three minutes. Such is the law of human slavery. My lucrative position was gone, and the union concluded it had better not tie up the whole shop for the sake of so small a matter, and I was simply cast out.

16. The months which followed were bitter ones. I had no work for many months, no friends to assist me, no proper clothing to wear. Many a day I had to walk the streets of New York in bitter cold weather, without any overcoat, with hardly a place to go, and at times with very little to eat. I began to feel that the way of the transgressor is a hard way. The unions would give no assistance, as I had not belonged to them a sufficient length of time. It seemed to me that I was forsaken of everybody, and what was the use.

17. In the spring, the labor organization gave me sufficient money to come to Massachusetts, thinking perhaps I could get work here, as Massachusetts was the home of the shoe industry. After a while I secured a position, but this did not last very long, as I was unaccustomed to their ways of working. Another position was soon secured, and I managed to get along very well for a time. While I had not reached wealth or fortune, I had enough to eat, and a place to sleep. But God was bringing me around in His own way through a hard school, for some purpose.

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           ^(p71) ISRAEL’S PRAYER Psalm 80 :1-7.

Give ear, O Shepherd of Israel, thou that leadest Joseph like a flock; thou that dwellest between the cherubims, shine forth.

Before Ephraim and Benjamin and Manasseh stir up thy strength, and come and save us.

Turn us again, O God, and cause thy face to shine; and we shall be saved.

O Lord God of hosts, how long wilt thou be angry against the prayer of thy people?

Thou feedest them with the bread of tears; and givest them tears to drink in great measure.

Thou makest us a strife unto our neighbours: and our enemies laugh among themselves.

Turn us again, O God of hosts, and cause thy face to shine; and we shall be saved.

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On to chapter seven

^(p71)                     EXPLANATORY    NOTES.

PARAGRAPH 3 (a). — The Jews are not buried in the same cemetery as the Gentiles; for the land wherein Gentiles lie is defiled. There is a Jewish tradition which says that if the Jew is buried in consecrated soil, when Michael or Gabriel shall blow the trumpet at the resurrection, the bones of the Jew will roll to Jerusalem, and will reach there in time to be raised from the dead.  Back

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